


Honey Moon

by magical_octopus333



Category: Animaniacs, Looney Tunes | Merrie Melodies, Sam & Max, Sam & Max (Comics), Sam & Max (Video Games), Sam and Max (cartoon), Sam and Max save the world, Sam and max
Genre: First chapter focuses on Bugs and Daffy, Gen, I'm tired, M/M, THe lead in bit to explain why they're at the wedding went on longer than intended, different chapters then!, im sorry, the next chapter is Sam and Max
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-15 09:26:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28686330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magical_octopus333/pseuds/magical_octopus333
Summary: Sam and Max are finally married, and two old toons are trying to catch some loose kiddo toons.(first chapter to skip if you're for Sam and Max)
Relationships: Bugs Bunny & Daffy Duck & Dot Warner & Wakko Warner & Yakko Warner, Bugs Bunny & Dot Warner & Wakko Warner & Yakko Warner, Bugs Bunny/Daffy Duck, Dot Warner & Wakko Warner & Yakko Warner, Max/Sam (Sam & Max)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 41





	1. Bugs and Daffy on the case!

“Daffy?” Bugs quietly called, making his way through the hotel hall. Daffy had only texted him a room number-F18- while they were hunting for the Warner siblings. 

‘Hunting’ wasn’t really the word for it, but it would do. The two toons had already been eating dinner near where the wedding had taken, so when one of the bigwigs had called them- they jumped

Turns out two toons were getting hitched. They hadn’t a movie, and their cartoon wasn’t that widely spoken about. But, they had been in video games and comics, and had a neat little cult following.

Ah yes, Sam and Max- Freelance Police. The pair was finally tying the knot- at least more publicly this time. Bugs knew the gossip- Daffy ensured that. The problem was the pair were chaotic. 

Chaos draws in chaos. And where there’s chaos?

“Ugh”, Daffy groaned as he pulled his phone out of the clutch he had brought to dinner. He squinted at the screen before tossing his phone on the table.

“I thought I told ya’ to silence your phone, Daf…” Bugs said, staring at the still ringing phone. It was on vibrate, but it kept going. 

“Well, that painting I commissioned is supposed to be done in a week,” Daffy spoke, grabbing his wine to swirl. “But I want to be ready when it's done. I mean- what if they made that bump on my beak even bigger!” 

The phone stopped ringing a second later, only to begin again. Bugs, slightly frustrated, plucks it off the table to eye whoever the contact was.

“Who is ‘enormous toupee’, Daffy?” Bugs asked, squinting at the blurry contact photo with it. Said toupee seemed attached to someone not pictured. 

“One of the big wigs over at Warner studios…” Daffy replied, checking his reflection in his spoon. He looked over at the rabbit, who had decided to answer Daffy’s phone for him, disgruntled. 

“Bugs Bunny here, Daffy has his head in a waffle maker at the moment-”

“I DO NOT-”

“Shh!” Bugs spoke, pulling the phone back and raising one finger to the disgruntled mallard. “We’re in a restaurant, birdie…”

Daffy grumbled, turning back to his meal with renewed energy. The bristling bird considered attacking his spaghetti with his beak head on, but shook the thought away. As much fun as it’d be to get under Bug’s fur, he didn’t want to risk his dress. It was one of the few that went with this clutch and wasn’t covered in marshmallow goo. Don’t ask. 

A heavy sigh from his friend pulled his attention away from his noodles. Said rabbit was waving the waiter over dejectedly. 

“Two to-go boxes and the check when you get the chance, please.” Bugs spoke, leaning away from the phone. From what Daffy could hear, the bigwig whoever seemed frantic. 

“Bugs?” Daffy asked, suddenly feeling uncomfortably concerned as he watched the waiter rush away. Bugs was shrugging on his jacket, already standing as the check appeared. 

“Right, right, we’ll get to it then… Mkay, bye- _bye._ ” Bugs spoke, ending the call and grouchily handing the phone to his friend. 

“You don’t have to come with-”

“Bugs Bunny, what the hell is going on?” Daffy stage-whispered, ignoring the toons who turned in the restaurant at the sudden clattering as Bugs quickly dumped his plate into his box, reaching over to Daffy’s to do the same before said duck swiped his hands away. “ _Mr. Rabbit”_ Daffy growled.

Bugs sighed, wiping a paw over his face. 

“You know that wedding happening a couple blocks away?” Bugs replied, handing the check with the bills to the waiter as he passed. 

“The dog and rabbit? They’re not playing with Dip, are they?”

Bugs glared at Daffy as he poured the spaghetti into the box, adding in as many breadsticks as could fit with gritted teeth. 

“No…” Bugs spoke, quiet but deadly. Nerve plucked. “The warner kids got out again…”

Daffy tilted his head at the bunny before scrambling after him, juggling his phone, clutch, leftover box, and their wine bottle. The one they hadn’t opened yet. Nor purchased. 

“Whats that got to- they’re going to the wedding?” Daffy called out as Bugs resituated his jacket, foot thumping as the valet slowly pulled up. 

“ ‘Parently…” Bugs spoke before yanking the kid from the car and tossing him to the duck. Said duck side-stepped and got in the car, grabbing as Bugs immediately floored it. “They left their plan on the ground a bit away from the tower…”

“Wh-why are we running over then?! A little wedding crashing is good for them!” Daffy yelled over the wind. 

“Because the studio doesn’t know if Sam and Max would recognize them as kid-kids not adult-kids! Like Baby Herman!” Bugs snapped back, eyes never leaving the road as they swerved hard around a corner. “They’re chaotic enough sober, is what the studio thinks!”

Daffy stared at his friend, who seemed more and more panicked. 

“Yakko wouldn’t let his sibs get drunk… at least not unless he had some like sniffyscratch or whoever.”

The car lurched as they just managed to stop at a red light

“... they’re from a mature video game, Daffy. ‘Nd while they may be nice fellas, they may not attract the best of pals. Those kids have made enemies… who know who may have Di-...” Bugs shook his head, as if trying to keep the taste of that word of his tongue, staining his head. 

The rest of the car ride was silent. 

Of course, they were lucky. Sam and Max had a kid. No outside beverages, no drugs, and the bartender would cut you off easily. However, no one had seen the kids. 

As the pair were looking through the crowd, Daffy suddenly smacked Bugs in the chest. Bugs grabbed his arm, looking frantically around.

“D-didja see em? Daf??” Bugs called, whipping around. 

“No, it's- hey!” Daffy squawked, falling as Bugs shoved him off. “We forgot a wedding gift!” 

“Oh for crying out-” Bugs huffed a sigh, trying to reign his temper. No need throwing a fit- while no one had seemed to recognize the pair, that could change quick. “We- that wine bottle from the restaurant-”

“Our Stella Rose bottle?” Daffy spoke, placing his feathered hand against his chest, aghast. He threw himself into the other’s arms, sighing. “Must we sacrifice our lovely, cheap child?!” 

Despite himself, Bugs managed to snort, still chuckling as he helped Daffy back up.

“Nice one, spaghetti lips. Now-”

“Spaghetti lips?!” Daffy squawked, drawing in stares. “I’ve had tomato sauce on my beak and you did- mmph!” 

Suddenly, Bugs was pulling him out of the room by his beak, his fur sticking up by his neck and ears flattened back. Daffy immediately regretted it. Well, almost.

Once the pair were hidden out of the way, in some coat storage, Bugs let go of his beak. Daffy rubbed his gently, looking away. If they were on camera, he’d have kept up the complaint with his appearance. Instead-

“Sorry Bugs…” Daffy whispered, his hand reaching out to pat his friends back, as the other was trying to catch his breath. Daffy pulled the other into him, feeling his chest rise against his own. 

“It's okay, Bugsy…” Daffy whispered, rubbing circles into the other’s back. “Those kids are troopers. These toons in here are too wrapped up in dancing and gorging themselves on the buffet to notice us. 

Slowly, steadily, Bugs caught his breath. It took a couple moments, with Daffy chattering nonsense into his fallen ears, his hand moving through the fur on his spine. He pulled back from the other, feeling tired and a bit numb, but better.

“Better there, Bugsy?” Daffy spoke softly, concern soaked in his dark eyes.

Bugs only nodded, a firm grip on the other’s shoulder tightening before letting go. He ignored the sudden coldness, shaking his head at the thought. 

The universe was clearly on his side as someone opened the door a jar before suddenly slamming on the airhorn they had slipped into the gap there. Bugs, still coming down from the adrenaline, screeched and slammed into the ceiling before falling back with a thud. Daffy hissed, smacking the airhorn down and stopping the noise.  
“Are you decent?” the voice called out- young, and clearly bored. 

“Are you?!” Daffy spat, feeling his feathers stand on end. He thought about bringing out his mallet when the kid slipped into the room, closing the door behind them. They had a button on their vest that read “The best human”, and their orange hair came to their shoulders. 

“And there goes the safety deposit…” they spoke, looking to where Bugs was trying to wiggle his head out of the ceiling. Daffy hopped up, grabbing one of his large paws and letting gravity bring them both down, as well as a cloud of dust. 

“Well, if you hadn’t pulled the airhorn-”

“It kept me from getting an eyeful this evening! Do you know how many couples I’ve found playing pattycake in the spare rooms here? Too many…”

Daffy squared up, ready, to pull a mallet, when Bugs put a hand on his shoulder. He stood down, still glaring at the kid.

“You must be the Geek,” Bugs spoke, clearly tired. “Any chance you’ve seen three little kids running about?”

The Geek straightened up, turning their attention away from the glowering guy to Bugs. They seemed to be looking him over, noticing the anxious line of the man. 

“The ones trying to get adopted?” the Geek spoke carefully, watching the pair in concern. Bugs visibly relaxed, leaning against the wall while Daffy blew out a breath. 

“Told you the kids were fine, Bugs…” Daffy spoke, pulling a little mirror out to check on his spaghetti lips.

“Wait, are they your kids?” the Geek said, looking between the pair concerned. _Smart kid_ , Bugs thought. 

“Eh, I’d never make a good dad.” Bugs spoke, pushing himself off the wall. “They’re from Warner Studios. We’re supposed to bring ‘em home. Make sure they don’t drink and all. Any chance you can tell us where they are?” 

Geek sighed, pulling their phone from their pocket. They rapidly typed something before sending it, pocketing the phone away. 

“No, but I let them know a rabbit and duck are lucking for him.” The Geek opened the door and gestured to it. “Thanks for not making out in here, but get out. And don’t forget to hand off whatever wedding gift you got for the pair, I guess.”

“See! Wedding gift!” Daffy spoke, smacking Bugs as they slipped out of the room. “Go get it outta the car, I’ll find the kids.” 

Before Bugs could argue, the other had disappeared into the crowd. He simply shook his head as he made his way outside, thinking to himself.

“ _I’ve earned a nice carrot after this… covered in chocolate preferably…_ ”


	2. The Honeymoon Suite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh, a just-wed couple's room after the event. What ever could they be doing?

“Over here Bugs!” Daffy stage whispered, and as Bugs turned the corner, he found Daffy standing over the kids, sleeping by a hotel room door. Said hotel room had a ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign hanging on the knob.

“Looks like they fell asleep waiting for them to get in. Looks like a no on adopting 'em right now...” Bugs replied, kneeling down to fuss with the blanket tossed on them. “At least the wedding pair were kind enough to toss this on ‘em…Come on”

Bugs scooped up the brothers in each of his arms, leaving Daffy to scoop up the youngest Warner. The duck pulled a blanket from his own hammer space to wrap up the little girl, smiling as she nuzzled closer into his feathers. 

Suddenly from the lovers’ room, the bed’s springs could be heard, as well as some chuckles. The pair looked at each other, faces heating up ever so slightly as they stepped away from the room. 

“Sounds like they’re starting their honeymoon early, huh?” Daffy joked as they shuffled into the elevator. Bugs managed to not laugh until the doors closed, trying not to shake too hard with the brothers on his hips. Daffy just turned his snickers away, tucking a stray bit of fur from the girl's face.

~~~

"You sure this won't wake the kids up, Max? We might get loud."

"Worse case, they do and then we whack 'em with a mallet!" Max replied, his grin showing every serrated tooth he had. Well, that he had in his mouth. Sam let out a little growl, which Max tried to ignore. 

"Alright, alright! No Mallet! Geez... you know they're proper old timey toons, right? They look a bit like us before we left the comics!" 

"Yeah, but we promised to do honeymoon and then see about adopting more kids... but-"

"No buts mister!" Max replied, hopping into the other's lap. "You can't bring kids on the gun cruise! We're lucky The Geek was old enough! Besides, we'd need to get waivers and- wait..." Max sniffed the air before hopping over to the door. "I smell spaghetti sauce!" 

"When did you order room service, chucklehead?" Sam asked, untying his tie as he watched his friend. His Friend, his Best Friend, and now his Husband once more. He quickly reached a hand behind him to muffle his tail from where it was wagging on the bed. 

"Aw man... it looks like they have parents!" Max stage whispered as he leaned back off his tiptoes. Sam shook his head before joining his husband to see the other pair. 

"Hey, a rabbit! He's a tall fellow-"

Sam felt himself smirk as he heard that tell-tale noise. He turned that smirk towards his friend, who was trying his damndest not to pout. As if he hadn't already stomped his foot down with a little grumble. 

"He and his partner are just grabbing the kids, little pal. M'kay?" Sam spoke placing his paw on his lover's shoulder. When he didn't look up, the dog picked him up before gently tossing him onto the bed. It seemed to do the trick as the lagomorph broke into giggles as the bed creaked under him.

"I've been waiting all evening for this..." Sam said as he pulled his tie over his head and tossing it over his shoulder. "You ready?"

Max giggled before standing up among the comforters. "More than ready Sam!" Max called. 

Sam let out a growl before launching himself onto the bed, sending Max flying a foot up and cackling all the way. Max fell back into the bed before launching himself back up. Sam matched pace, bouncing upon the mattress with his own deep laughter fitting perfectly with Max's cackling. He couldn't help but smile to himself.

The light from a street lamp outside filtered through the white curtains of their room, and as Max soared up, the light lit his fur up in the yellow, and he could see his lovers eyes closed, that grin still filled to the brim. He seemed to glow in their darkened room, and Sam felt as if the world was in slow motion for the moment.

He blinked and they were still jumping, his friend unaware of his cheesy sentimental moment. At that moment, Sam knew. He wouldn't give this up for the world. And he wouldn't ever need to either. Not that they knew that or were even thinking of it. They just enjoyed the company of their partner, bouncing to their heart's content. Actually until Max got his head stuck in the ceiling. They really weren't getting that deposit back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I don't write smut... While I'm sure these two would like to go at it like rabbits- hehehe- I thought this was fitting too. Let me know what you think!


	3. Epilogue

“Careful-”

“ _ Me _ careful? No, you be careful! I’m not the one who nearly made the kids sit in  _ my _ leftovers!” 

Bugs sighed, watching as Daffy gingerly placed Dot beside her older brother. He assumed Yakko would like to have both on either side, and the younger ones to have window seats. The pair had been whisper-arguing for a bit, worrying at the kids sleeping soundly. 

“But I didn’t- do you think they need more pillows?”

Daffy turned to his friend, giving him a look before turning back to the car.

“Any more pillows and we won’t be able to find them in ‘em” Daffy grumbled, moving to get into his own seat. “… Besides, it's cold and I’m tired of helping you rearrange them with more and more blankets and pillows.”

“Thats exactly why they need another blanket- or we can put the top on the convertible-”

“Why drive a convertible if you’re just going to put the roof up?” Daffy replied, incredulous at even the suggestion of putting the roof up. 

“So ya don’t get wet when it's raining, feather-brain.”

“...fine, mother hen! Pull the roof up- see if I care! But I tell you, you lose your street cred pulling a move like that…”

They made it back in, the security guard quietly waving them in. Parking the car right next to the water tower, Bugs quietly got out and pulled the roof away. It’d be easier like that. 

The kids had curled into a little nest together during the drive. Bugs found himself smiling fondly at the kids, all peacefully coiled together. He looked up to see Daffy doing the same. 

“Alright-” Bugs whispered, catching Daffy’s eye when he looked up. “I’m gonna head up and poof them up a solid big bed- I do not want to wake ‘em right now…” 

“I heard Dot’s a nightmare in the morning-”

“You’ve got that right…”

The pair looked down to find the eldest warner rubbing the sleep from his eyes. His siblings were still soundly sleeping. He made eye contact with Bugs before looking at where his siblings were still clinging to him. 

“I-I’d like to have a big fan moment right now, but I don’t want to wake ‘em… what’s going on?”

“Well, Bugs and I got sent to bring you back to your tower.” Daffy replied, crossing his arms. “Found you sleeping outside the newly weds’ room.”

“We missed ‘em, then?” Yakko whispered, looking glumly down at his siblings. 

The pair looked at eachother, uncertain how to comfort the young toon. Daffy shrugged, still rubbing his arms. 

“I-if it helps any, the Geek is getting older, and their other kid has already moved out- so they may get empty nest syndrome?” Bugs whispered, smoothing back a fur piece. 

“The Geek is their kiddo?” Yakko asked, shocked. “That explains that! Oh, I got their number-”

“And you can message them later. Right now, you need to get to a real bed so I can get to mine” Daffy finished. Bugs felt his ears flatten back of their own accord, causing Daffy to scrunch up tighter. 

“Actually, let me go poof up a bed while you two talk- that way some progress is being made…” Daffy replied, quickly and clumsily scurrying up the ladder. 

“Sorry about him”, Bugs said as he turned back to the elder Warner. Yakko seemed surprised and shook his head at Bugs.

“Nah, I get it.” Yakko easily replied. “Besides, we’ve dealt with way worse.”

He felt his ear twitch, but before he could ask, there was a snap, and they were in the tower. Him, the kids, and-

“You transported my car up here?!” Bugs whisper-yelled at Daffy, snapping his own fingers so the kids found themselves in the bed, and the car was gone with a cloud of smoke. 

“Not everyone has as overactive toon powers as you, Bugsy!” Daffy replied, pulling another pillow into existence to toss to their nest. Yakko caught it before it landed on Wakko’s head, trying not to laugh. 

“No, some of us just have common sense!”

Yakko sat silently snickering as he wiggled his way back into their nest gently. The other two didn’t move much, still grabbing for him in their sleep.

“As fun as it is to hear you two bicker like an old married couple,” Yakko interrupted, right as Daffy held a surprise pie behind him. “- ya’ ought to get home… but thanks for the ride here…”

Bugs smiled, stepping over to pull one more blanket over the three of them. Daffy leaned against the wall, close to the door but still watching quietly, ignoring the heat in his cheeks.   
“Our pleasure, kiddo. Let us know if you want your Uncle Bugs to give you another ride- I’ve got a convertible.” He said the last bit smugly, ignoring Daffy’s grumbling. 

“Oh-” Yakko spoke, pulling his phone out of his pocket before opening it to contacts and handing it to him. “Could I get your number then? I promise it’ll only be for emergencies!”

Bugs smiled and took the phone, putting in both his and Daffy’s number, before sending a text to them both. He stood up, finding where his charger was and plugging the small device in.

“Thanks, Mr Bunny…” Yakko spoke, smiling sleepily.

“Thats Bugs to you, or Uncle Bugs ifn’ you prefer… good night yakko…”

  
  


“Finally! Love the kids, Bugsy, but I’m tired! I’ve been walking in these heels all evening!”

“You know, ya’ coulda’ just took em off? You usually don’t wear shoes anyway.”

“It was a formal occasion! I couldn’t be caught walking around barefoot!”

“Well then, stay in the car. I’m swinging back by the hotel. Something I forgot…”

“Sam and Max wedding party- how much did we need to pay on the safety deposit?” The Geek asked the next morning at the front desk as her parents cleaned up their hotel room.

“What do you mean?” the man at the desk asked. “A Mr Bunny came in around 3 am and paid it off, and asked that the damages be charged to his account…”

He leaned forward, a smile peeking from below his bushy stash. 

“I do believe that was  _ the _ Bugs Bunny!”

“... huh, that’s why they looked familiar…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to have the yakko talk with bugs... i had to!

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, i got carried away here. This was just suppossed to be a little blip to explain why the pair are at the wedding, and I've already wrote too much to toss. AND ITS LATE ANYWAY... Its sunday somewhere...


End file.
